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英语二人幽默对话

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英语二人幽默对话
One day,a village idiot won the first prize in the lottery(彩票).
“How did you guess the lucky number?” asked his neighbor.
“Well,three times,I dream of seven; so I figure it out that three times seven are twenty-four,and I bought the ticket with number 24 then I won the first prize.”
“Why,you blamed fool (你这个傻瓜!).Three times seven is twenty-one not twenty-four.”
“Is that so?” said the village idiot,Well,twenty-four won,anyway.”
经典对话一:
男:Can I buy you a drink?(我可以为你买一杯饮料吗?)
女:Actually I’d rather have the money.(不必,我我宁愿留下那些钱.)
经典对话二:
男:Can I have your name?(直译:我能有你的名字吗?)
女:Why?Don’t you already have one?(为什么?你不是已经有一个了吗?)
经典对话三:
男:I’m a photographer.I’ve been looking for a face like yours.(我是摄影师.我一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸.)
女:I’m a plastic surgeon.I’ve been looking for a face like yours.(我是整形外科医生.我也一直在寻找一张像你这样的脸.)
经典对话四:
男:Is this seat empty?(直译:这个座位是空的吧?)
女:Yes,and this one will be if you sit down.(是的,如果你坐下,我的座位就是空的.)
经典对话五:
男:Haven’t I seen you some place before?(我好像以前在什么地方见过你?)
女:Yes.That’s why I don’t go there anymore.(是的.这就是为什么我不再去那个地方的原因.)
经典对话六:
男:Will you go out with me this Saturday?(这个星期六你想跟我出去吗?)
女:Sorry.I’m having a headache this weekend.(抱歉.这个周末我头疼.)
经典对话七:
男:I think I could make you very happy.(我想我能让你非常快乐.)
女:Why?Are you leaving?(是吗?你是说你要离开?)
One day a guy dies and finds himself in hell.As he is wallowing in despair he has his first meeting with a demon...
Demon:Why so glum?chum?
Guy:What do you think?I'm in hell.
Demon:Hell's not so bad.We actually have a lot of fun down here...you a drinkin' man?
Guy:Sure,I love to drink.Love the drinks.
Demon:Well you're gonna love Mondays then.On?Mondays that's all we do is drink.Whiskey,tequila,Guinness,wine coolers,diet tab,and fresca...we drink till we throw up and then we drink some more!
Guy:Gee炉hat sounds great.
Demon:You a smoker?
Guy:You better believe it!Love the smoking.
Demon:Alright!You're gonna love Tuesdays.We get the finest cigars from all over the world and smoke our lungs out.If you get cancer - no biggie - you're already dead remember?
Guy:Wow...that's...awesome!
Demon:I bet you like to gamble.
Guy:Why?yes?as a matter of fact?I do.Love the gambling.
Demon:Cause Wednesday you can gamble all you want.Craps,Blackjack,Roulette,Poker,Slots,whatever...If you go Bankrupt...well you're dead anyhow.
Demon:牋 You into drugs?
Guy:Are you kidding?Love drugs!You don't mean...
Demon:That's right!Thursday is drug day.Help yourself to a great big bowl of crack.or smack.Smoke a doobie the size of a submarine.You can do all the drugs you want烬nd if ya overdose - that's right - you're dead - who cares!O.D.!
Guy:Yowza!I never realized Hell was such a swingin' place!
Demon:You gay?
Guy:Uh?no.
Demon:Ooooh?(grimaces) you're really gonna hate Fridays.