作业帮帮我看一下我的自我介绍有语病吗?
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：拍题作业网作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/05/21 01:25:16
帮我看一下我的自我介绍有语病吗?
Hello, my name is Tang luyi. I'm 13 years old. I’m in NO.12 Middle School .I like reading, writing and drawing very much. They both give me a lot of fun and build my unique personality as well as my goal and dream.In the study, I also have the place which very many needs to improve ,but I'm very positive and look forwards to my future because I'm will realize my goal.
Hello, my name is Tang luyi. I'm 13 years old. I’m in NO.12 Middle School .I like reading, writing and drawing very much. They both give me a lot of fun and build my unique personality as well as my goal and dream.In the study, I also have the place which very many needs to improve ,but I'm very positive and look forwards to my future because I'm will realize my goal.
首先they both的both 你的前面列了三项所以应该用all 然后你的goal和dream应该加上s或者冠词the 还有那个从句语法不对 应该是place which needs to improve 最后那个总感觉不太顺 不如来一句谚语：Where there is a will,there is a way有事者事竟成 就放because后面
再问： 谢谢，能在我的原文上帮我修改吗、
再问： 谢谢，能在我的原文上帮我修改吗、