作业帮请修改，并评分（以及评分依据）
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：拍题作业网作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/05/12 15:40:51
假如你是红星中学高三（1）班的学生李华，10月10号你们学校举办了校庆活动。请根据以下四幅图的先后顺序，描述你们班所做的事情，给英文校报投稿。 注意：开头已给出 October 10th was the birthday of our school. Our class did a lot for this year’s anniversary celebration. Saveral days before the celebration,we started to decorate our school.Some of us hung up the colorful flags .Others cleaned up the play ground. one week ago,we put up the pictures to show the history of our school.Not for long,those pictures drew the attention of students' quickly. At the day of the anniversary celebration ,we stood nearby the gate.we welcomed people who had graduated from our school warmly.On the evening,we gathered together to watch the dancing programme on the ceremony.We all enjoyed ourselves very much. Everything on that day went on smoothly.I was glad to see our efforts eventually paid off.解题思路： 同学你好，你的写作基本可以，能把要点表达出来，逻辑清晰，全文时态正确，最后结尾总结的也可以。如果按满分25分的话，我认为可以得19分。主要是里面出现了一些小的错误，句式有些单一，我已用红色字体作了简单修改，你核对一下吧，你可以尝试着多使用一些句型和复合句。提高写作能力需要多加练习，要加油哟，希望能很快看到你进步！
解题过程：
修改如下：（红色）
Several days before the celebration, we started to decorate our school. Some of us hung up the colorful flags and others cleaned up the play ground.
After that, we put up some pictures to show the history of our school, which drew many students' attention quickly.
On the day of the anniversary celebration, we stood at our school gate to welcome the people who had graduated from our school warmly. In the evening, we gathered together to watch the dancing performances on the ceremony. We all enjoyed ourselves very much.
Everything on that day went on smoothly. I was glad to see our efforts eventually was paid off.
解题过程：
修改如下：（红色）
Several days before the celebration, we started to decorate our school. Some of us hung up the colorful flags and others cleaned up the play ground.
After that, we put up some pictures to show the history of our school, which drew many students' attention quickly.
On the day of the anniversary celebration, we stood at our school gate to welcome the people who had graduated from our school warmly. In the evening, we gathered together to watch the dancing performances on the ceremony. We all enjoyed ourselves very much.
Everything on that day went on smoothly. I was glad to see our efforts eventually was paid off.